Preparing myself for him.

When you live in the Mitten, you must prepare yourself to deal with sinus issues. I've been having pretty severe sinus pressure the last few days. Claritin normally takes excellent care of it, but recently it hasn't been doing much of anything. Peter has been aware of the pain I'm in, so he sent a text to check and see how I was doing. I was feeling better than I was earlier in the day, so he told me to prepare myself for him when he got home. He requested I wear my blue and black corset with my silver boots, and at 8 o'clock I was to put my plug in. I was a bit nervous to say the least. It had been a while since I last had anything in my bum, and I wasn't sure how excited I was to do that again. To be completely honest, the whole idea of it is hotter in theory than in the actual act of it. I'm not saying I don't enjoy it, it's just not my favorite. Anyway....

I hopped in the shower around 7 and began getting ready for him. I put on the corset, but had the damnedest time reaching all of the hooks. I hate it when that happens, but I did the best I could (getting all the bottom ones, most of the middle, and part of the top). I got the lube and my plug out once I had the corset and boots on and started to lube it up. It took a bit of trying to relax to get it in. Probably took a good five minutes at least to get it in. Once it was in, I didn't really want to get up and chance it shooting out, so I basically stayed on the bed, legs up in the air, and waited for Peter to get home. When he walked in the bedroom, he was only in his boxers. He looked at my presentation, and admired it. Commenting on how great it looked. He asked me to roll over on the bed. He went over to the suitcase where we keep all of our toys, and grabbed the plastic paddle. He began lightly swatting my bottom, and part of my legs which stung a bit. Harder and harder...he worked up to more forceful blows until my ass was red and burning to the touch. Peter grazed his hands across my skin, and took a few swats with his bare hands to feel it grow hotter with each blow. He asked me if I wanted more. If I deserved more. I begged him for more, and told him I deserved it. I had been a good girl. I just wanted it so bad. I was not expecting what he did next, but I was pleasantly surprised. He began running the pinwheel up and down my inner thigh, so close to my pussy. Teasing me. Taunting me. Pushing harder. He grabbed the can and ran it across my skin. The first crack he took didn't sting much, but it was not light by any means. One after another, he whipped the can in strategic places. A few minutes in, he stopped to admire his work again and commented on how it was a work of art (I wasn't entirely sure what he meant by that until I saw the marks later). Peter gave my ass a few more crack with the cane before having me stand up. He kissed my neck and grabbed my hair, pulling me to the ground to suck his cock. After a few moments, he told me it was time to take out my plug. He lubed his cock up and told me to bend over on the bed. He slid slowly into my ass, making sure I was fully prepared for him before pushing himself deep. He fucked me for a while...telling me how such a good little slut I was being. He brushed his hands against my ass as it bounced against his hips with each thrust, admiring his work yet again. Sir loved how good I had been for him, and allowed me to cum. He let me use my toy, pulled out, and watched me pleasure myself with my ass in the air. He pushed in as I was nearing another orgasm and continued to fuck me. Sir asked if I wanted his cum in my ass and I begged him for it. He then stopped, and said no. He told me we would clean up, then he would fuck my cunt. He told me to come sit by him when I got back into the bedroom. I kneeled next to him and he kissed me before telling me to lie on my back. When his cock entered my cunt, it felt fantastic. He told me how good of a slut I was being for letting him fuck all three of my holes, and he would reward me with his cum.

After cleaning up, I took a look at the work he had done. It sort of looked like he used the cane in a circular motion, making the marks look sort of look like rays of sunshine. I forgot to take a picture last night, so this is a next day picture.

Bruising has already started to happen, so that is nice, but you can still see some of the red marks from the cane. To my surprise, there was no stinging sensation last night after the fact while we went about our evening. My skin must finally be getting used to it (although the right side seems a bit more sensitive to the blows).

Next Saturday is my 25th birthday. Peter managed to get the afternoon off from work. He'll still have to work most of the day, but he'll be able to do things with me for my birthday. I plan to go out for sushi with Peter, some close friends, and my family. I'm not terribly excited about my birthday in general (just some personal issues), but I'm doing my best to stay positive that it is going to be fun.

I should get going. Peter will be home in an hour and I still need to take a shower and feed the animals.

Bruised tits.

A lot of people joke about it, but never really go through with it. What am I talking about? Steak and a blow job day. Men say Valentine's Day is for the women, so a day was "created" exactly one month from V-day for the guys to "get theirs". I'm actually not one of those girls who really celebrates V-day, and Peter knew that. But because it was our first V-day together, he still wanted to do something nice so he bought me a little box of chocolates and us matching Scott Pilgrim coffee mugs. I thought it was sweet and incredibly thoughtful, but felt like an ass because I didn't get him anything. Yes, we never said we were doing anything but....he was thoughtful, and I felt twatty. Anyway....flash forward to March 14th. He had to work 4pm to midnight, so he didn't get his steak, but he did request his blow job when he got home. He told me to put on sexy panties and some makeup....more specifically, red lipstick. I did as I was told, and was ready for him once he got home. He sat on the edge of the bed and told me to kneel for him. I started to lick the tip of his cock slowly, making him grow hard very quickly. The moment I started to take him in my mouth, lipstick started to come off on the side of his dick. I took him in deeper and deeper, finally taking every inch of him in that I could and closing my lips around his shaft, leaving a red ring very close to the base of his cock. Peter was loving every minute of it, which was great for the first 45 minutes. I really do enjoy giving him pleasure by tracing the length of his cock with my tongue and wrapping the curve of my lips around it. It makes him moan and gets me wet. Even if it's not physical pleasure for me, I still feel great knowing I'm making his day. But 45 minutes plus my previous jaw issues make things rough sometimes. After the first 45 minutes, I started to use my hands a bit. Then we switched so he stroked himself while I licked and massaged his balls. When he was close to cumming, I he allowed me to lick the tip of his cock while he stroked. When he was ready to cum, I took him in my mouth to swallow all of his juices.

Peter has been battling a horrible sinus infection the last few weeks, so we haven't really done too much since then. He finally has been feeling better this week, and we had sex last night. I was feeling extra horny and extra naughty, but I wasn't sure how he was feeling. He originally just wanted me to suck him off, but I told him I wanted sex. When he told me I could cum, I was having difficulty. Haven't not been rough in quite some time, it made it hard for me to really get there in my head. He was holding onto my tits as he fucked me and I rubbed my clit, and I begged him to smack my tits. And boy, did he smack them. I came fairly quickly once he started doing that, and he followed me. I didn't realize how hard he was hitting them until we were done and he said my chest was red. He wasn't joking. My tits are incredibly bruised, but I barely felt the force he was giving me. I was just so into it and....fuck, I crave a beating right now. A long, drawn out beating.....one that starts with him tying me up to myself and then to the bed...tapping my back, ass, legs, tummy....everything with the cane. Yeah, I think saying I'm aroused right now would be a mild understatement. I'll see if Peter would be alright with me posting a picture of my bruised tits and get back to you all.

Aside from that, nothing much has been going on. Peter now works 56 hours a week until further notice, so we don't have much time to do anything. I'll be leaving home soon to spend time with Ad and Bel soon which will be nice since I haven't seen them together in a few weeks.

Until next time....

Everybody has issues.

Even with all of the events going on in my life right now, I want to keep writing in here. I might not have a bunch of new stories, but maybe I can just talk about the life Peter and I lead and maybe go more into the dynamic of our relationship. Maybe not…..who knows. Just a heads up that there might not be a whole lot of new kinky tales. They will probably pop up here and there until things settle down, but I will do my best to write in as much detail as I can when they do happen. Today there will be a short one.

Peter hasn’t been feeling very good lately, he started to come down with something. We weren’t sure what, but after looking online at his symptoms we were almost positive it was either salmonella or a horrible version of the stomach flu. I know salmonella would have been a huge stretch, but he had more of the symptoms to that than he did the stomach flu (although the symptoms are quite similar). It wasn’t until he was at work yesterday when out of nowhere his fever came back and he developed serious sinus pressure and congestion (which he has not had the whole time he’s been ill). He decided to go to the doctor after work, and found out he had a bad sinus infection. The doc still checked him out for all the other issues he had before the horrible congestion, but basically it was all leading up to this. Go figure. That wasn’t even one of the possibilities when we checked his symptoms online (obviously we understand the web isn’t a medical professional, but it was still odd). His doctor gave him super antibiotics that will hopefully kick the shit out of this infection because this is the second sinus infection he’s had in the last three months or so. I’m really hoping for the light at the end of the tunnel to appear at any moment.

The other night when Peter wasn’t feeling too terrible, he told me to go to the bedroom and get naked because he wanted to see my ass. I did as I was told, and he bent me over the bed. He began to swat at my bottom with his bare hands. We had just walked in from outside not long before, so my body was still so cold which made each crack hurt a little more than normal. I quickly warmed up to his touch as he continued to wail on my ass. Turning me so that I could suck his cock while he continued to spank my ass, he made sure my pussy was nice and wet for him before he bent me back over the bed and began to fuck me. Sir moved his hand between my legs as he pounded away into me. He rubbed my clit until I asked permission to cum. Once permission was given, I didn’t hold back. I gushed all over, soaking the floor beneath me, part of the bed frame, the skirt I had taken off prior to fucking, as well as myself. My own juices dripped down my legs as he began to fuck me harder. A few moments later, he flipped me over onto my back and pushed himself deep inside. Sir held his hand to my throat and pressed his thumb hard against my soft skin. Slapping me a few times, asking if I enjoy the fucking he is giving me…the little slut that I am. When he came, he was painfully deep inside my cunt and it felt so powerful. I was allowed to clean myself up before coming back to bed to lay down. He did not make me clean up the mess I had made on the floor, he soaked it up with my skirt while I cleaned myself up.

Earlier this week there was a submissive munch going on not terribly far from where we live. I figure it would be a nice way to meet other submissives in the general area, and just get to know someone out this way. Most of my friends live close to an hour away which isn’t terribly far. But to just go grab a cup of coffee or a drink, the drive can be a bit much. I talked to Peter about this and he was a little unsure of it at first, but knew it was something I really wanted to at least try. Unfortunately by the time I had learned about the munch, it was only a few days away, and I still have a lot of healing to do from all the crap that has been going on in my life. I have been keeping to myself for the most part which doesn’t make me the greatest friend right now. Luckily my closest friends are very understanding of the situation, although some do wish I would talk about my issues more. For me, it’s a matter of feeling like a burden or a downer. I don’t like dropping my problems on other people if I can help it. I do talk to Peter about a lot of stuff, but I feel like I’m a downer even with him. He doesn’t give off the impression that I’m bringing him down or anything, I just don’t want to accidentally bring him down with me. He has enough on his plate with work, car, and health problems that I don’t want him to worry about my stuff on top of it all. I expressed this to him, and he made me feel more comfortable. He explained that we’re a team now, and my problems are ours now, and we will deal with them together. Which me being the type of person I am makes me worry more because I don’t want him to have to worry about all the stuff I do. Which, he doesn’t. He’s the type of person who can see a problem, and ignore it if it isn’t actually his problem. For instance, my mother is having issues right now. They don’t directly involve me, but I know a lot about what is going on so she vents to me. I get so involved emotionally with the issues that it gets me worked up and worried, which leads to many panic attacks. Most of which happen when Peter is not home (she has a knack for calling when he isn’t home). Then by the time he gets home, even if I had a good day, I’m drained of everything and I just sulk. He understand that I’m going through a lot on my own, and he has been wonderful trying to help me get through the bad days, but he hates that I get so worked up over something that is not my problem. I’ve tried telling my mother that she needs to talk to a therapist instead, but it’s hard. I feel like I have to sugar-coat it because I don’t want her to think she can’t talk to me. It just gets frustrating when she asks for advice about the same thing over and over again and then blatantly ignores my suggestions every single time. I understand times are tough and she can’t get to a therapist because of the cost (even with her insurance), but she needs to do something. As do I, but I’m working on it. Sort of.

Anyway. My birthday is coming up, and I’m trying to figure out what I want to wear for whatever I end up doing. I’m considering ordering something awesome from Trashy.com, or just get something from Noir Leather next time I’m out that way. I still haven’t decided what I want to do for my birthday, but I know it will involve dressing up fancy for a nice dinner with my friends, and who knows after that. The idea of going to this place called City Club has been brought up, but I’ve only been there a couple of times and it gets quite crowded and warm in there. Or I could just skip that, and just come home after dinner and have fun with my Sir. I still have some time to think about it before the actual day. Hopefully I can figure out something to do by then.

You arrive at a party you thought was vanilla, but as you walk in, you see the kinkiest thing you've never done & wanted to on the left. To the right, you see the thing you love doing or have done to you the most. Which way would you pick & what is it?

This was a really difficult question for me to answer (as you know since it has taken me soo long to answer), but I believe I finally have an answer.

I think as long as it was in a completely controlled environment, and Peter was there to do it....I would do the thing I've never done but always wanted to try. And that would be electro play. We both really want to try it, and I've never even tested any of the toys for that out before, but I really want to. I'm betting if the tools were there, then someone would know how to properly use the equipment and walk Sir through it (if he needed any assistance that is). Now, I might need to get warmed up before trying the new thing (especially if I wasn't aware of it being a fetish party, and wasn't mentally prepared for it). So there is a chance I would start off with a light caning and have that gradually grow to my normal level of tolerance before going to the new thing. Though who knows, maybe the fact of doing it at a party with other people might be enough to get me from zero to ready without a caning session (but I honestly wouldn't know for sure since I've never been to one).

Ultimately though, I would want to do the new kink.

Thank you for the question!

Ask me anything!

You're my medicine.

I know my updates have been pretty scarce. I've been dealing with a lot of stuff lately and keeping my depression at bay has been extremely exhausting. I do have good days though, and when I do have them, I take full advantage of them.

Last week Peter and I wanted to do a little playing. Nothing too extreme since with how my head has been lately, we don't really know when I'm going to snap out of my "good day". He told me to bend over the bed, but would not let me lay my torso on it. I could only use my hand and arms to rest myself on the mattress. Sir spanked me with his bare hands for while, switching back and forth between cheeks. I took it like a champ, and barely cried out. He rewarded me with the flogger before fucking me.

Another night He told me to suck his cock. I sucked for a long while until my jaw started to do the closing thing (I have been sucking his cock a lot more lately, so naturally my jaw issues would come into play at some point). Sir had me lay on my back and hang my head over the edge of the bed so I could lick his balls while he looked at my naked body and touched himself. He ordered me to get myself off while I licked him. I swirled my tongue across his skin as I brought myself to orgasm. When he came, it was a lot...and all over my tits. He usually does have pretty intense orgasms when I play with his balls, so it wasn't too much of a surprise. I enjoyed being covered in him until he cleaned me up.

We've both been very busy the last couple of days. Last night I went to see the Scissor Sisters with Bella and Addy. It had been a couple of days since Peter and I last had sex, and I was incredibly horny all day. Once I figured out when I had to meet the girls at Addy's house, I told Peter we would have time to play around a bit. He was especially excited for this since he knew I was dressing up in a sexy little outfit for the concert. I sent him a little picture of the back of my leg where my mini skirt ended, and I was holding the cane against it (somehow he never got it....weird). When he got home, he was in a horrible mood. Work for him wasn't bad until the last half hour or so when some shit went down. After he calmed down, I figured we would snuggle so I took my boots off while he went to the bathroom. We laid down next to each other for a few moments and snuggle kissed, then he ran his hand up my leg, feeling up my fishnets and underneath my skirt. He asked what kind of panties I ended up going with. I showed him that I just did black boy shorts under the black lace boy short top that was part of the fishnets (something I had never seen before...they are very cute). He then told me to pull them down a bit so he could see my ass. He started to stroke himself as he looked at my bare ass under the skirt. Then He told me to kneel on the ground and suck his cock. I took him in my mouth with enthusiasm, swirling my tongue around his cock for a few minutes. That's when I decided to take him really deep down my throat. I sort of unhinged my jaw the wrong way, causing me to get a charlie-horse. Luckily I was successful at getting him down as far as I wanted to first before having to move my head back. He loved it, and had me bend over the bed. Still having my panties and fishnets not pulled all the way down, my legs were practically closed when he penetrated my cunt. It felt absolutely incredible. He kept pulling my skirt down over my ass so it just peeked out while he fucked me. He spanked me and called me his little slut, making me want it even more. I begged him to cane me, telling him I had been a really good girl all day. He fucked me harder for a few more thrusts before plunging deep into me and staying there for a few moments while I cried out. He went to grab the cane, lightly tapping my legs with it. A hard hit here, a few soft taps there, more hard....Sir gave most attention to my right leg (I assume because it's more sensitive these days than the left for some reason, and needs to be trained). I thanked him when he stopped, and he continued to fuck me. I had become so wet from the caning, he slid in and out easily. Sir wanted me to cum for him, so I reached to touch myself. Once I achieved an orgasm, I convulsed enough to push him out, but he didn't miss much of a beat and just went back to it. He ordered me to cum again (a second orgasm without having to ask? Hell yeah!). When I was done, I just continued to enjoy the feeling of him inside me. I could feel his cock swelling up inside me: he was going to cum soon. I asked for permission to touch his balls, and he allowed it. Then I begged for him to fill me. He came pretty hard; not enough where I felt it hit inside of me, but I could feel how much he grew just before exploding. I went to clean up, then came back to the bedroom. He checked my legs; the marks were pretty wonderful, and my ass had taken quite a beating from just his hand spanking it. I put my boots back on, and headed out the door to see my friends. The skirt I was wearing was short, but I think it still covered my marks up a little. Though if there were any short people  that happened to look my way, they may have seen them. It's not that I'm super tall or anything, but even at 5'6" I feel like an amazon. Add 3 and a half inch platforms to that, and I'm super tall (I really wish I wasn't so tall because I love wearing tall shoes, but I hate being naturally tall).

Ok, now I'm babbling. So tonight I took a couple pictures, not too many. Today hasn't been one of those "good days", so I wasn't really in the mood to do much. I put some in photoshop and did a little something to make a banner for the blog, but I'm not sure which one I should go with.

 This one, I did the rope work. I'm not good with rope work. I suppose I don't really need to be since I'm not the one tying someone up. So yeah....one of these days I'll see if Peter will tie me up and take some pictures of his work.

You can kinda see the marks Peter gave me (the dots on my bottom are from his hand, and all the other ones are from the cane). It was a light caning obviously.

My gag! We haven't really used it since we got it, but I love it. I would really like to use it, but we just haven't found a time to do it. Eventually. ^_^

Oh! And here are the two banners I've been messing with. Might add more to them, but I still gotta pick which one I want to use.

Might add some flourishes or something to them to fancy them up or something.

Tush is a little bruised.

I swear....if it's not one thing, it's another. I started to develop a cough at some point last week, and it only seemed to get worse. Determined to not get sick, I tried to ignore it and just use some cough drops. Peter and I attempted to do a little playing Wednesday night. He tied my wrists up and brought out the Wartenberg wheel. He ran it all up and down my back, ass, and legs. Leaving tiny dotted lines all over my skin. He got out the plastic paddle and started to give me a good spanking. I'm assuming a combination of not feeling great and my senses being heightened, as well as it had been a long time since I've been really paddled made the next thing happen. I cried out for him to stop, then I rolled over to my side. He kept telling me to roll over in a forceful voice, and for some reason, I just didn't want to. I apparently wasn't in the headspace I should have been in, and I just blanked. Finally I rolled over and he ran his hands across my bottom. Then he untied me, and we stopped. I didn't want him to really, but he could tell something was wrong. Why didn't I roll over when he asked? He told me he wasn't going to paddle me again right away and that I should have just trusted him. For some strange reason, I was unsure if he would paddle me again. There has never been a time where I felt like that before, and it didn't even seem right for me to feel like that. He had done nothing wrong....I just wasn't there. Apparently my body wasn't ready for all of that and it knew, but I didn't. I was so focused on getting some play time since we haven't played in so long that I didn't even consider the idea that I might not be able to get into the proper headspace at that moment because I was about to get very ill. We did eventually have sex that night, but it wasn't rough at all. Peter was very gentle, and everything felt incredible.

Thursday I ended up going to the doctor because it appeared I was getting sick (big surprise). Not the typical head cold. It was all in my chest, and I couldn't stop coughing. According to the doctor, I have bronchitis, pharyngitis, and an upper respiratory infection. She told me to keep taking the medicine I was taking (Robitussin DM, Claritin D, and Musinex D), and then gave me a prescription for an anti-biotic. Go big or go home, right? So annoying. I spent the next couple of days trying to feel better. By Saturday night I was feeling a bit better, just a little tired. I asked Peter again if we could play, but nothing too hard or crazy. Since I was still sick, plus it had been so long since I've had a good beating I figured a little light play would be a great way to get me back into the swing of things. We weren't able to have regular sex though because I was to see my gyno on Monday for my annual exam, and you're not supposed to have vaginal intercourse a couple days before that. So he started off by having me bend over on the bed, and he dragged the flogger up and down my back. The feel of the streams running up and down my back were so familiar and comforting. The first few whips were soft and gentle, like streamers on a bicycle brushing against your skin as they blow in the summer breeze. Peter began to flog me a little harder every few whips or so, then stopping again to caress my skin with the streams of the flogger. After a few moments, he had me turn around to suck his cock; my reward for doing such a good job of taking my flogging. Peter brought out the paddle and swatted one cheek at a time, caressing the reddened cheek with his hands between ever few. After several switches between cheeks, he would allow me to suck on him again, then it was back to my paddling. Harder and harder he hit, the right cheek seemed to be more sensitive than the left to the beating. Finally, he said "one more good one" before letting me take his cock into my mouth once more. He fucked my mouth for a few minutes as he told me how such a good girl I was, and allowed me to play with my pussy while my tongue danced around his cock. He told me to turn back around, and put my ass in the air for him. Sir rubbed my asshole with his finger tips, then switched to tease it with the tip of his cock before grabbing the lube to get me ready for him. Praising my devotion to please him, he pushed himself inside my ass slowly and gently. Once Sir was balls deep in my ass, he told me I was such a good girl. He allowed me to continue to rub my pussy while he fucked me. When I felt an orgasm coming on, I begged for him to allow it. He asked me a few questions like if I really wanted it, and how close I was....just tormenting me, and keeping me on the edge before he granted me permission. I came a couple times before he unloaded into me. It was a pretty interesting night, and my ass still doesn't feel right. I told him we may have to give my ass a break from sex for a while, and he is alright with that.

I am completely frustrated with his work right now. They made him work 4pm to 4am last Monday (but he didn't find this out until after he had started his shift that was supposed to only last until midnight), and then they promised he wouldn't have to do it again this Monday. They lied. He sent me a text to say he most likely will have to do it again. I know we can use the money, but I hate that they are wearing him down like this. It is most likely going to make his body less resistant to sickness from all the stress and lack of sleep, and he is probably going to catch what I have. We have had enough bad luck with crap just happening. Yes, I am very grateful that he even has a job in this economy, and I know I should just can it but...I just worry about his health. Physical and mental health.

One good thing about when I go home today: I get to open a package that came for me today. I had ordered shoes from Snaz57 over a week ago, and Peter said it got delivered. Nothing too fancy, just a cute pair of mary jane's and then a pair of calf boots. I already feel like an amazon as it is a 5'6", so I know I don't need 3 inch heels but.....I loved these soo much, I couldn't pass them up. Peter and I want to go to the Dirty Show this weekend, but those plans are still up in the air. If we do go, I may wear one of my new pairs of shoes out for it.

I suppose I can break off now. I have a few more things I want to get done before I leave work tonight, then it's off to dance around in my new shoes, and then curl up with the TV.

Dealing with loss.

I started writing this entry basically the day after my last entry because like I said, I wanted everything to be fresh, and with every detail I could muster up. Unfortunately, more sickness as well as tragic events shook things up....



Tuesday, January 25th when I got home, Peter was on the couch so I went to go relax with him. I kicked my legs up on his lap while we tried to figure out what to do for dinner. He started smacking my leg repeatedly. I tried to make him stop a couple times until I realized he wasn't doing it to be a dick....he was prepping my skin. It's been a while since I've had a good beating, so basically I've gone soft. I took it for a while, my skin was red hot, until he decided to give me a break. We went out, did dinner, then came back and started preparing fruit bowls for the week. By the time we finished that, it was late and he had to get up early for work (by early I mean 1am). He gave me a choice; either we could have fun that night but not to the full extent we were hoping (and risk him being exhausted for work), or we could have fun the next day and really go all out. I opted for the latter, but we still had sex. When we got to the bedroom, he pinched my nipples and forced me to my knees. I told him that I thought we weren't doing the whole shebang, and he simply said that that doesn't mean I can't be on my knees for him. I sucked on him for a while, then he told me to get myself ready for his cock. I lubed up while I continued to suck on him a few minutes longer, then he had me get on my knees on the bed. He fucked me for a while, and couldn't stop grabbing my ass and just staring at it. He hasn't fucked it in so long and I know he really wants to. Even if I hadn't known before we started to fuck, I would have because he kept circling my hole with his thumb as he fucked my cunt. Eventually he had me flip over so he could be on top of me. He told me he wanted me to cum for him, so I began to touch myself. It was in this moment when I realized just how much it turns me on to watch him watch me masturbate. I don't know if it's just that he was watching that, or the fact that he was watching me touch myself while he fucked me. Either way....it was hot, and I came so fucking hard. I started to play with his nipples when he moved back down closer to me, something I noticed a few nights ago that really does it for him. Flicking my tongue against them, sucking gently on them, pinching them...it drives him wild. I found a nice rhythm between what he liked while he fucked me. Listening to him moan, his cock swelling inside of me, the familiar rhythm of him moving in and out of me pushed me over the edge again. Peter loves it when I am actually able to cum without the use of hands or toys. I do too, especially because it rarely ever happens. It turned me on so much, I really started focusing on his nipples again, this time more with my mouth and sucking them. First sucking light, then harder, and back again. I could tell from how he moaned that he was getting closer. Finally he came, and I held onto his nipple until I started to feel him come down (which wasn't for 20 seconds or so). We were both exhausted and just laid there for a few moments while we tried to catch our breath before cleaning up. I sat with him in bed for a little bit after while we played games our own DS. Even though I was just sitting there, I was still trying to get my breathing back to normal. It was just really good sex with fantastic orgasms.

Wednesday night Peter had plans to tie me up and do lots of fantastic things to me. We went out to dinner to watch the hockey game, then came right home to get to it. Well, I wasn't feeling great after eating. Something didn't taste right in my food. So we just started to ease into things. I sucked Peter off on the couch for a while. He said it felt so good he didn't want me to stop, so I didn't until he came. He was going to "take care of me", but from how he said it....I thought he meant just get me off, and I didn't want just that. So I declined, and got ready for bed. I started to not feel too hot, so it ended up working out. Though he later explained that he meant he was going to flog me a bit, but  like I said....not feeling great.

Thursday I was rudely awoken at 5am by the urge to be sick. I spent about 75-80% of the day in the bathroom violently being sick. Once I felt like I wasn't going to be sick for at least 10 minutes, I called the restaurant to let them know what had happened. By Friday, I was better. I just felt really sore and still a little nauseated, so playing was still out of the question.

Saturday, January 29th in the early morning I received a call from my mother with some terrible news. One of my best friends (who was considered family) was killed in a car crash late Friday night. I have basically been wreck since, which would explain why I seemed to drop off the face of the earth for the last couple weeks. We've tried to have sex since then and it has been good, I've just been not really "all there".

Yesterday before going to a super bowl party, we had sex and it was really good. Randomly I asked him to use the candle wax. Now, I've never done this before, he has. So it was my first time getting hot candle wax dripped on me. At first it was a little intense and I wasn't sure if I liked it. Peter dripped it on my chest and stomach, then a little on my legs. He had me move to the edge of the bed so I could suck on his cock while he dripped the wax on me. Covering my tits with the wax as I screamed with his cock deep in my mouth...ahh, I'm sure it was quite a lovely sight for him. I know I sure started to enjoy it. When he moved to slide inside of me, I was super slick so he slid right in. He fucked me as he dripped more wax on me. Sometimes when he'd bring the candle up higher, it would splash against my skin and small drips would hit my neck, sending crazy sensations of slight pain all over. I asked him to drip some directly onto my nipples. I wanted to know what that felt like. I will say this right now....it is painful. A sexy kind of painful, but still....painful. They are still quite tender today.

I wanted to play when we got home, but neither of us was feeling up for it. I'd love to play tonight, but his work has decided to dick him around once more, so his new Monday work schedule is 4pm to midnight. Yes, he still has tomorrow off, but I don't so no playing tonight. If I want any sort of play action tomorrow, it will basically have to be right when I get home from work because he has to wake up on Wednesday at 1am for work.


I'm still trying to heal from all of the pain of my friends death, but I know it is going to take a lot of time. I keep trying to distract myself with things I enjoy doing, but every down moment I get I just feel....off.