Thursday, December 30, 2010

What is the best movie you've seen this year?

That would be a tie between Scott Pilgrim vs. The World and Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1. Both were excellent in their own ways.

Stingy or thuddy?

Oooh...if this is in reference to sounds (which if it isn't, I apologize, that just seems to be where my mind is right now) that is quite an excellent question! Difficult to answer, but excellent! Hmm....I would have to say....thuddy. The flogger that my Master uses has some weight to it, and makes this great thud when it hits my back. Iit just sends shivers all over my body, I can't get enough of it!

Do you skew younger or older in your partners?

Older for sure. I have accidentally become attracted to men in the past that I eventually found out were a year or so younger than me, but older has always been what felt right for me.

My plug is iridescent purple, what's yours?

Things have been very frustrating lately. The original treatment for the yeast infection I used didn't work all the way. I talked to a pharmacist, and she said that since I didn't stop taking my antibiotics until three days after the treatment that it would be wise for me to get a second treatment, and if that didn't help that I should see a doctor. So I made the plan to get a new treatment (a three day treatment box this time) on Wednesday when I went to Peter's after work. He had told me he had a surprise for me when I got there, so I was really excited. When I got there, we sat on his couch and he said we should go get me a plug. I asked if that was my surprise, but it wasn't. We went out, got my treatment, then stopped to get me a plug. He also picked up some new lubes to try, and I found a new clitoral stimulating vibrator (nothing fancy, just something simple to get the job done when I needed it). The plan was for us to come back, I was going to make dinner, then we were going to try out the plug (since anything vaginal was still not an option), and then I would get my surprise. Well, we were too excited and ended up trying out the plug first. I wanted to cleanse myself first, so I hopped in the tub and cleaned up before heading to the bedroom. Peter did his best to try and make me comfortable. Kissing my chest, down my stomach, my legs...nibbling here and there. Then he made it down to my ass and bit the cheeks a few times before using his tongue. I tried so hard to just relax and enjoy it, but I couldn't. He grabbed the lube and got me ready for his fingers. I had trouble even with that. I was so incredibly uncomfortable for some reason, and with me tensing up plus his nails....it felt like he was trying to tear me apart from the inside. He was very aware of how I was feeling, and kept asking if I wanted to stop. I didn't want him to, but I know if I did, he would have been completely fine with it. We decided to try with the plug. It was a long smoother than his fingers (no nails), but it hurt. And he went SLOW. Holding just the tip in for a few moments before sliding it back out, then in again...just a little further than before. At this point, I was on my knees with my head down onto a pillow. My ass up in the air in all it's glory. Peter was sitting behind me by the end of the bed, sliding the plug into me and stroking himself slowly. It was really turning him on, how much I was taking in, and he kept reassuring me and telling me how good I was doing. It was really starting to hurt right towards the end, but Peter kept encouraging me. Next thing I knew, it was in. He was so proud of me. He held the plug in place for a moment, then moved up to kiss my head, and allowed me to take his cock in my mouth. I only had the plug in for maybe five minutes before he took it out, re-lubed, and then gently pushed his way in. The plug hurt coming out, and him going in right after didn't feel much better. He told me to use my new toy, and I begged to cum (it had been nearly two weeks since I was allowed). But I couldn't do it. I was so distracted and so uncomfortable that it made me tense, and completely unable to relax and enjoy the moment. Everything was painful. He stopped. Went to go clean himself up, and brought me a rag to clean myself with. When I came back, he wanted to make sure I was alright, and just cuddled me under the covers for a while. I felt terrible, but I knew it just wasn't going to happen that night. I motioned to please him, and he said we could wait until I was ok again. We laid there for a few minutes, and I started to stroke him. Slow. Almost like a gentile, comforting rub like you would do to someone's shoulder or back when they were sad. That went on for a few minutes, and he was loving it. He eventually told me to suck his cock, so I moved down to do as I was told. He was clean at this point, don't worry, I made sure to ask him that before even touching. I approached this task with grace and elegance, which are not the type of things you would ever think to associate with sucking a mans cock, but that's the best way I can think to describe it. Saying it was sweet just doesn't seem to do it justice.When he came, at first it seemed normal, but the second burst hit the back of my throat with such a force that it gagged me, so I had to pull back. I really wasn't expecting that. I helped him clean up, and that was the end of that. I felt terrible that I was unable to continue with anal, but he understood.

Peter's job was making him work both Christmas Eve and Christmas day, so we had to try and work everything around that. I met him at his parents house at night on Christmas Eve after looking at lights with my family (a tradition of ours), then it was back to his house for sleep since he had to work early the next day. I went home to spend the morning with my family after he left, and then went back to his house after he got home from work to do our gift exchange and then go to his aunts for dinner. We both spoiled each other this year (I suppose that is common for your first Christmas together). No kinky items were exchanged, although I did get him a set of Cutco knives that I'm sure he could put to use on my skin at some point. After all was said and done, I was a bit more relaxed by the end of Christmas day. We decided to try again. This time, I requested for him to not use his mouth down there and instead just touch. He brought out the flogger and began to whip me with it. Not what I was expecting at all, but it seemed to really work. It was so familiar and comforting...plus I had been longing for something of the sort, so it just really chilled me out. Peter began to use his fingers, making sure I was well lubed up before he pushed his way in with his cock...no plug this time. I'm sure we could have used it and things would have been fine, but we were both just so excited. It hurt a little, but I was able to calm down and just take it. I can't remember if I've ever said this in here before or not, but I'm beginning to realize that I can enjoy anal much more when it is mean, and raunchy. It just seems like a dirty thing, and so it feels better when He says things to me that fit the situation, or holds my head down to the bed and pushes his way deep into my ass. Calling me His slut, and that sluts like me love to take it in the ass. I wouldn't say I love taking it in the ass, but in that moment...when he's telling me to take it like the slut I am...I can't help but get into it. I was able to cum that night. It felt like such a relief. I screamed so fucking loud, it felt really good. When we were done, we stayed in place for a moment. The second Peter pulled out, I was shocked with pain, and a great deal of it. It was as if he had fucked everything aside, and it was all trying to shift back into place at once, causing me to cry out in pain. Not a good kind of pain either. Peter imediately asked if I was alright, what happened, and what he could do. After a minute or two of not moving, I was completely fine. Everything seemed to be in order, so I got up and went to clean myself off. No blood, no nothing. I was right as rain. Well, my ass was a wee bit sore, but that is quite normal after getting rammed in the ass repeatedly, ha.

Tuesday while I was at work, I developed a horrible migraine headache that would not go away. I took the strongest pain medication I had on me left over from my dentist visit, and that didn't even touch it. Any sort of light felt like needles being shoved in my eyes, going deep into my brain. Peter asked if I wanted him to come get me since I couldn't even see straight and just felt horrible. Not even a full minute after he got here and I was telling him what he could grab, I ran to go throw up. It was terrible. He got a new trash bag plus an extra one for the road from one of my coworkers, then we headed out. I didn't even make it back to his house without throwing up again, plus a couple more times at his place. It was just terrible. He rubbed my back as I got sick, and made sure I had water by the bed and a cold rag for my head. He did all of this around 9pm when he had to be up for work by 1am. He is very good to me. I spent the next morning trying to get some work done on my laptop, and trying not to feel sick. After I got some work done, I laid down and took a nap. Didn't get up until right when Peter was about to get off work. So I jumped up and hopped in the shower. Had to turn the shower off twice and open up the window because I thought I was going to pass out. When Peter got home, I was on the bed, still naked from the shower, and just trying to catch my breath, head still spinning. It seemed all of my ailing was done with. I had checked with my finger the day before, and it appeared that my infection was gone. We were both horny as all getup (even though I was feeling like crap), so we decided to try to have sex. We also decided to try out the other new lube we had bought (one was water based, the second was silicon based....which is the one we decided to try). It went really well. When he slid in, it felt like he was re-stretching me to accommodate his size. It felt so good, and so right. I really missed having his cock deep inside my cunt. We both just kind of let ourselves go and enjoyed the feeling for a while, going slow to make sure it didn't worsen my headache or stomachache. Peter had made sure to apply the lube all over, including my clit, so it was ready to be rubbed. He massaged my clit over and over again until I came a few times. He pulled out at one point, and I think he was hoping I would squirt. I think due to my lack of hydration, it prevented me from being able to squirt. It felt good none the less, and he continued to fuck me after. When he came, we laid there for a few moments. Of course, once all my issues are done with why not start my period too? Things were a little messy, but not too bad, so clean up was quick.

Today, I am quite horny. I think having Peter inside my cunt for the first time in two and a half weeks really kicked that in high gear. I want it so bad again. Tomorrow is new years eve. He has to work, but then we're going to my friend's house for a little party. I am hoping to get a new dress for the party, but if not....something sexy from my trunk will be worn for sure. I do hope Peter and I have time to have a little fun first before we go to the party. I long for a good beating. I want it so fucking bad.....Not gonna lie, I kind of want to go to his house and be there when he gets home from work tonight (after midnight) and be waiting for him, but I know he has to be up for work at 7am, so that is a no-go.

I hope everyone had a great Christmas (or other holiday that you may have celebrated, or hell...even if you didn't celebrate and you just drank and masturbated all day). Best wishes for the new year!!!

I have a few questions to answer on Formspring today so check back for those after reading this. Feel free to ask me some questions yourself!

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Pleasure for Him

It's been a minute, so I'll make a quick update.

Health-wise....I'm doing better. I finished taking my antibiotics on Friday, so I figure I'll give it an extra day or two for the irritation from the yeast infection to clear up before I start freaking out (apparently they can take up to a week to go away, even with medication). So we'll see. If it doesn't clear up by the end of the week, I'll be getting my ass to a doctor first thing Monday morning. I just hope I can find somewhere that is good, but also really inexpensive.

I'm really excited for Christmas this year. I didn't get Master anything kinky like I did for his birthday, though one of the gifts could be used for fun I suppose. Hmm....I still have a few more days. I can't really afford it, but I would like to get him something fun. Ahh...Maybe I'll get lucky and I'll get something fun from the Kinky Santa on FetLife. They allowed you to ask for three things. I asked for a Multi-Cuff Wrist Suspension Cuffs, an Apprentice Violet Wand Kit, or a Royal Pains (in the Butt) Set. The wand kit I know Master has been wanting to try, but they are awfully expensive. As for the Royal Pain set, that is a set of canes.....all that I would be more than happy to take a beating with from Master (and I believe he's been wanting more canes). The cuffs are more for the appeal of me I believe. I have always wanted to be suspended, and these would be so comfortable and perfect. I just hope I am chosen to win. They are giving away $15,000 in gifts away, and if I'm not mistaken you only get one. My first choice was the cuffs, then the wand, and the canes are third. So....cross your fingers for me!

I know He is really excited for me to heal. He really wants to fuck me, and I can't wait for him to be able to. Since I couldn't over the weekend, I just pleased him. He made me go down on him a few times, but he made it worth my while. There were times when he would pull my head up and kiss me, then he'd twist and pinch my nipples while he rubbed himself before forcing my head back down onto his cock. I hate that my jaw has a tendency to close up and start to hurt because it makes me have to switch back and forth between mouth and hands. It's annoying for me, and I can only imagine that it sucks for Him (especially if he's getting close, or it just feels really good). The second time he had me do it, I actually wasn't in the mood at all, and really didn't feel like it. But I did because that's what a slave does. I ended up getting into it which is typical, so no harm done. I swallowed each time like always. Peter said if I ever don't want to, he would be alright with me going to spit it out. That is really nice of him because I'm sure there would be times when I don't want to, but those would be rare. Even if I don't want to, I still try because I know it will please him (though I'm sure now as long as I'm happy, he'll be pleased). Except the hardcore play sessions. Those don't happen unless I am totally into it, and if I'm that into it....I will take it as it comes (pun intended).

I think that's all for now. Hopefully I'll have something crazy to write about soon! Thanks for the comments! Keep 'em coming! Oh, and don't forget, if you have a question and you want to ask anonymously or not, ask me on Formspring!

Hope everyone has a lovely holiday!

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

No sex for a while.

I've been dealing with a lot at home lately, so going to Peter's for the weekend was really needed.

We both worked our last Saturdays for a while at our jobs, and then snuggled together. We only had sex a few times this weekend, and it seems I am out of commission for a little bit. After sex on Saturday, I felt some irritation. Normal when there isn't enough lubrication, but I don't remember there being a lack of it. The pain got worse after sex on Sunday. Granted, it was a little rougher than the night before (I recently dyed my hair pink and Peter was having fun grabbing hold of it from behind as he rammed into me). When Peter realized how much pain I was in, He suggested we hold off for a bit and let me heal. I decided to ask some questions to the people over at FetLife, and got some good suggestions. I tried an Epsom salt bath last night and that gave me almost immediate relief. Then I also tried this cream that was suggested (Traumeel). It says it's for muscular and joint pain, but I figured what the heck. It seemed to also help a little bit with the pain, and that's when I started to notice the irritation. Not irritation from the cream, but a more familiar kind. I've always been really prone to yeast infections for some reason, so I figured that's what it must be. I even went back on FetLife and thanked everyone, saying what had worked and that I thought I was now getting a yeast infection. And of course, I was right. I am so incredibly uncomfortable and irritated right now, it's not even funny.

I stopped on my way to Peter's for some relief medicine yesterday. I couldn't decide if I was just having yeast infection-like symptoms or if it was a straight up yeast infection, so I went to talk to the pharmacist. She said it is probably a yeast infection caused by the antibiotics I'm taking for the tooth infection I had. I spent the extra $2 and got the one-dose stuff instead of the three-dose, which I am now wishing I hadn't. Before bed I used it, cleansed with a medicated wipe I had bought (just for added relief), and then applied the external cream that came with the medicine. I woke up in the middle of the night in pain and so much irritation. I couldn't get back to sleep for a good hour or so. It was horrible. I even got up to go use the medicated wipes, and that didn't seem to help much. I tried to distract myself by booting my computer up and searching out doctors. Since I don't have any insurance, I have to be kind of picky about where I go. I have to make sure they are either low cost, or that they at least will do reasonable payment plans with me for anything they have to do for me. I found a couple I was going to call on if the pain or irritation got any worse. I put on the TV and started to watch some random rerun of Scrubs and eventually passed out. Glasses on and all.

Woke up today feeling much better. I used the wipes again then hopped in the shower. I considered putting the external cream on, but after the night I had, I decided against it. Although I was feeling better, I still felt very uncomfortable and irritated. Everything felt raw and swollen (which means I probably scratched myself in my sleep more than I thought). I'm doing ok now, I just really wish this would clear up soon. I really hate this feeling.

I think if I ever get some extra money (which I doubt I ever will), I will find a doctor and find out why I am so prone to yeast infections. I am very careful about making sure my area is always clean so I don't think it has anything to do with that. I'm not sure, but it could possibly be a genetic thing. Who knows. All the websites I've read say even with one-dose medicines it could take up to seven days for an infection to clear up. Ugh.

Monday, December 13, 2010

Was 2010 a good or bad year for you? Why? What are you hoping for in 2011?

2010 was not a particularly good year, but it wasn't terrible. I've dealt with bad news, deaths in the family, medical issues of my own, depression from all sides....this year has been hell. That being said, I did meet Peter this year, and that is something spectacular by itself. Cheesy, I know, but it's the truth. He has me completely smitten.

In 2011, I really just want things to get better. Yes, that's vague. I would really like to find a new job. One that pays a little better, is full time, and will give me medical benefits (and not being in a snowy state would be even better). I also hope that if I make enough money, I would be able to help my family out with their bills. I know that is not my job, but I have this need to help the ones I love. And if I can, then I will. I guess what I really want is just for a better year than this one was.

Thanks for all the questions! ^_^

Friday, December 10, 2010

biggest item you've taken anally?

Honestly, Peter's cock. We've never put anything else in there (except a finger, and once before a vibrator), and I am just fine with that. I really don't want anything else all up in my area, except maybe a plug. Peter wants to get me one so that we can properly train my ass, but who knows when we'll actually get around to doing that.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Do you have a holiday wish?

Honestly....I think I would wish for things in general to get better for my parents. They are dealing with so much right now, and it's just really hard on them.

I do as much as I can to help, but there is only so much I can do.

Monday, December 6, 2010

That's the spot.

This past week it was my special time of the month, so naturally my emotions were going haywire. Add that on top of all the stress I've been dealing with and you have a very easily triggered weepy Kai. Peter was very attentive, and helped me work through it all. At one point in the weekend I was just feeling physically gross. He held me while I cried and talked me down (as well as chuckled at how silly I was being, which....if you knew the dynamic of our relationship to a full, you would know that this was acceptable).

Work got in the way of everything this weekend. I had to work early Saturday morning, then again Saturday night, and once more Sunday afternoon. Now, this wouldn't be such a hassle if Peter or I lived anywhere near either of my jobs. But as it is, he is around 40 minutes away, and my house is roughly an hour away. Not ideal, but you know....that's how it goes for now. Basically....I did a lot of driving.

I was exhausted when I got back from work Saturday night. We relaxed and watched some TV before going to bed. My head was sore from the headache I fought so hard to get rid of all day, and Peter was dealing with one himself, so I figured it was just going to be a right to sleep kind of thing. I was a little horny, but I figured it could wait since we both weren't up to par. I was a bit mistaken. I was laying on my stomach all ready to sleep, eyes closed and everything, when Peter took off his pants and told me to suck his dick. I just chuckled and didn't move. Not really taking too kindly to my lack of obedience, he grabbed my hair and pulled my mouth down to his cock. I sucked on him for a long while, trying something new; breathing on his balls and legs. Ok, it's not really a "new" thing, I know that. I've just never done that before really. Earlier in the week, we were talking about strip clubs and he was telling me what they do for lap dances (I have never been to any sort of strip club, and he has). He mentioned how the strippers will breathe on a guy's crotch during a lap dance, and that it's really hot. So....I gave it a shot. Turned out to work pretty well because he shivered and made quite a few noises that got me going. When he was ready to fuck me, he had me bend over. I grabbed the lube and put a teeny-tiny drop on myself ("that time" seems to make me produce less of my own personal lubricant), and he slid in with ease. He fucked me for a nice long time. God, I love the way he feels inside me. He brought his hand up and put his thumb on my asshole. It sent shivers all over my body, and I told him if he wanted to do that he really had to lube it up and make me ready for it. Peter put some lube on his finger, rubbing my hole and sliding it in. He did his best to stretch it out which was a bit easier than normal because I was able to relax for this. The whole time he stretch my ass out, he was fucking my cunt and I was rubbing my clit. When he decided my ass was ready, he got a little more lube for it before sliding in. Let me tell you....it felt incredibly good. My cunt was dripping wet from all the fun (at first I thought it was from the lube I put on it, then I remembered I barely used any), so it was really hard to make myself cum. I had to keep wiping excess fluid on my thigh so I could actually get some friction going on. I begged Peter to be meaner (apparently anal sex equals "treat me like a fucking whore" in my book, haha), and he did. He continually called me a fucking slut, letting him fuck my ass and taking it like the whore I am. Fuck, I loved every second of it. Finally I came a couple times, and when he did he pulled out to cum all over my back.

The next day we had a little discussion about the sex. He was asking me how I liked it and everything, and I told him I really enjoyed myself, although I still get embarrassed about it. Ass play in general is a bit taboo in the vanilla world, and to be a girl and enjoy it? Well, that just makes you a slut or something. I mean, I've only allowed a couple of guys to do it, and each time it was not good for me. I'm still a little weird about His mouth being there and all. The first time I ever had that happen was back when I was super young, faking orgasms, and still thinking that was just how sex was ever going to be (so it wasn't completely enjoyable for me). Plus, it was a surprise. I totally thought that was something the guy really wanted so I pretended to enjoy it, but I was totally creeped out and turned off. Anal sex was just painful as all hell because the guys never did it right (I didn't know that then, but I do now). I'm not all that crazy about Peter tossing my salad, but put his fingers just around the area and I am game. Unless that's not what I'm in the mood for. But even then, I still will submit to his pleasure because I am His, and I am eager to please. I will say this....that session was probably the best anal sex session I have ever had. I wore a thong to work on Sunday, and the entire time I was there I was very aware of the fabric rubbing up against my asshole. Not gonna lie, I sort of enjoyed it.

I'm feeling kind of frisky tonight. Peter is about done with his shower, and then we're going to get some stuff to make dinner with. Hopefully we have a chance to have some fun before I have to go home. Last night when we had sex, He got to cum but said I had to wait until today. So I am very excited.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

If you could spend a day as a man, what would you do? Or would you do anything different from your normal routine?

Honestly, I would probably masturbate and just play with myself in general for half the day. That way when I go back to being a girl, I would know some things that feel really good for my man.

I think I would also enjoy trying to pee while standing. Typical, I know..but I've always wondered. haha.

What is the one question you would love to ask someone but never had the guts to?

I really have no idea. I've been thinking about this question since I read it yesterday. I can't really come up with an answer. Maybe I'll revisit it another time if I think of something. For now, I'm sorry.